Gaping Holes...

There are gaping holes in my Project 365! I am so disappointed in myself.... but in my defense we haven't been doing much and I should really pull myself out of this funk entirely (someday hopefully) and stay on top of it. I do plan on filling in the holes of my project (only because out of 365 photos I think I'll be missing only a small portion.

And I want to upload some pics of our little trip we took last week. Our landlord invited Jay and I and the kids to his family's beach house of the west coast so Jay could fix up a few things that needed attention. Flagler Beach is where it is located and it is just BEAUTIFUL! The few from the balcony is just mind blowing.

The first day Bob showed Jay all the things needing attention while I occupied the kids and worked with Bob on web site information (I'm building a web site for his Beach House to be rented). Then around 3 ish (give or take an hour) we all took a walk on over to the beach. It was so great, some mini waves (a lot more than what we'd see on the East Coast - in the Gulf). We stayed long enough for the kids to play and for Jay to try his hand and body boarding. I also saw a number of Star Fish!

The next day we woke up and waited for Bob to wake up (he's a late riser). Brooklynn, Cal, Jay and I sat on the deck enjoying the breeze and sun. After waiting for a while Brooklynn wanted to go to the beach really bad. So I decided that she and I would take a stroll on the beach alone together. So we walked over, bucket in hand, and just walked along the beach picking sea shells and enjoying time together. I have to say it was just amazing to relax with the wind in my hair, ocean at my feet, and my daughter ahead of me holding her capri pants up running along the shore....

Afterward we headed back to house with our finds. I sorted while Brooklynn played with the little girls who lived next door. She enjoyed playing with friends, I really think it's been good for her to have these experiences. I honestly think she is more friendly and outgoing than I was. I still find sometimes that I'm reserved, but for my daughter's sake I really need to learn how to take a more proactive approach to making friends myself.

We ended up going back to the beach, I took the kids minus Edyn while Jay finished up the odd jobs with Bob. The girls tagged along and they all had fun digging huge holes and building a sand castle. Brooklynn was actually really bummed because the kite she wanted to fly had broken so she was unable to fly it. I will have to get her one to fly soon...

So we packed up the next morning, cleaned the house spotless, and headed back East. It really was a great and exciting trip.

Here are some photos of the vacation :)

Reflecting

I hate it when I have those moments when I get so overwhelmed with daily life that I forget to take time to love the sweet little moments, or realize that I've been taking things for granted. I should've really learned my lesson on taking things for granted when my mom died. I thought she'd be there until she was old and gray AND wrinkled (haha sorry mom). Is it so sad that she didn't even get to see her 50th birthday, her daughter have 2 more kids, her youngest go to Prom, her first real boyfriend, and soon her high school graduation. Yes it is. But then not only did I take her for granted, but I still take everyone for granted. I feel like I will always have them around. In January Jay's mom died... 44 years old. She didn't get to see 45! What does that say for me? When am I going to die? Will I get to see my kids have kids? It just honestly has me worried.

But still today I am sitting here realizing that I take everyone for granted STILL. In my mind everyday is my dad and sister and my father-in-law. I pray daily for them to live LONG not just happy lives, but LONG lives. I worry so much about my dad. I worry about his drinking, I worry about his cholesterol, I worry about his stress and whether he's going to be here and for how long? Will I get a call that somethings happened? How will my sister take it?

I sometimes wonder if we did the right thing moving down here... of course I will miss them terribly, but I'm thinking about my kids... and not to mention I hate the snow. Honestly, after school is over and once I've gotten a good paying job I want to be able to take at least one weekend every month to fly up and visit just because I know how precious family is and my family, whether they know it or not, they mean the world to me AND THEN SOME.

Playing Catch Up - Easter Morning

Goodness will I ever get the hang of having three kids? That and I'm having such a hard time with motivation lately. I really need to do something to kick my system in the butt and get myself moving!! Believe it or not I'm starting to enjoy cleaning my house so I can take pride in my house. I enjoy doing school work because I know where it'll take me in the future. I also enjoy blogging, baking, cooking, photography, website tinkering, and scrapping... but I literally have NO motivation for ANY of that! I mean cleaning yeah I can understand lack of motivation... but seriously? Why don't I have motivation to do ANYTHING??

Anyway.. thought I'd play catch up with Easter Photos and MAYBE I'll come back someday to post about the awesome vacation Jay and I and the kids took last week!

These first few photos are of the Easter Baskets...


**Cal's New Shades**


Looking at his baby sister's pail instead of his own, lol.



I knew she would want a stuffed animal, but she's not the bunny kind of girl. So Mrs. Easter Bunny made the call for her to get a Frog!


This is a onesie Edyn had gotten from Tiffany in a bag of "Hand Me Downs" a BRAND NEW
tag still attached Old Navy Onesie... I saved it for Easter!


The remnants of chocolate cupcake on her face as she checks out her new LPS Bunnies.


And ditto for Cal.


Edyn checking out her Easter Goodies.



She's loving it!



Cal's cool Spider-Man Pail.



Brook's Cool Tinkerbell Pail



Little Bit of the Hunt! Yes I did hide that egg in laundry hanging on the line...

And his first Easter where he was able to participate in!!

Easter Prep!

It's been a busy day! We've been running today and it's bee a fairly productive day. At 11am we started getting the kids ready to go to the babysitter's. We were so lucky to have found such an awesome landlord. Jay does work for reduced rent, their 15 year old daughter (and our landlord's wife) watches the kids. We've only been out twice. Once last month for her to get the hang of the kids and meet them so Jay and I could go out to eat. Then today so Jay and I could get the things for us to prep for Easter. We were able to get some cute things. Easter is one of the Holiday's we don't really go all out for yet. No decorations or crazy amounts of food or basket goodies. Just simple and nice.

We were able to score these pails for the kids' "baskets" at Wal-Mart. Initially I had picked out three baskets for $4 each. But Jay suggested the pails...and I just had to agree. The things are going to be rough to fit in there, but at least those pails will last longer and be used more often (instead of just tomorrow). I got some candy from Walgreens because they had these Chocolate Creme Eggs by Russel Stover and Carrot Bagged Reece Pieces. Then I ran to Publix to grab some cake mix to make cupcakes on the fly!

Once we had picked up the kids and came home we quickly cleaned the house and the crap from the backyard (that the previous residents had left). Then we warmed up the leftover Chinese and sent Caliber to bed because he was acting REALLY grumpy because he had a full day with the babysitter and ended up taking his nap a little late, ha really like 5 hours late! After conquering my son, "Seek & Destroy" (as my step-mom - his Mamaw Ermlich - calls him) Brook and I set out to color some eggs! The egg coloring kit we got has these nifty little plastic cups already in it. I decided to only do a dozen eggs. And after trying last year to color eggs and then later trying to eat them only to discover they were SO NOT COOKED all the way, I decided to crack one open just to make doubly sure that I was successful in my attempt. That left us with 11 Eggs... still enough for a 4 year old and a 16 month old I think.

So following are some pics of our Easter Prep.


These are the coloring cups the kit came with!


These are the face stickers that came with it, Brooklynn had fun making the faces!


This is Humpty Dumpty... we made up our own rhyme, "Humpty Dumpty sat on the couch; Humpty Dumpty had a great ouch; All Brooklynn's horses and all Brooklynn's men couldn't put Humpty together again."


Brooklynn and I shared the cupcake making responsibilities.


Filling the cups.

And after Brooklynn went to bed.... the Easter bunny went to work with his surprises!


Adding Jelly Beans to the already frosted cupcakes...


And filling the spring pails with goodies!

**Coming up later - An Easter Morning Update!**

Getting Set up [again].

Well here I am getting the blog set up again. Not only do I dream of stability in my personal life but also in my blogging life...ha never right?

new.

New Blog everyone. I've decided to use WordPress with my domain just so I can have everything where I want and so I can do more things that Blogger has limited me...

Check it out HERE

just.

I don't know. I'm just... I'm stuck between here and there... in most every aspect of my life. Like there is this hurdle right in front of me... I'm not sure whether my efforts are good enough to make it over, or if I'm just scared. Scared to take the big leap. I can see the other side and it's pretty nice.. smooth ride. I don't know what is holding me back.

On to scrapping.

I used Traci Sims' Posh Princess Kit for this LO:

Birthday Princess

Credits

I also used Traci Sims' Child's Play and two of her Glitter Kraft Paper Alphas for this LO:

What's in a name?

Credits

And I'm also now a part of Diamante Designs by Lori Wiley's Creative Team. This is the first time I've been on a creative team for this grungy - real style of designer. I am so excited. Here is my first LO as a member of her team. I used Cheerful Bliss Papers and Elements. Along with some other alphas by other designers.

{kool}ade face

Credits

So... I have some photos of the past few days but I haven't uploaded them yet...I think I will soon - photo a day - this has been pretty hard to keep up with I'm missing maybe 2 days a week every week... but I'm trying!

friday.

It's Friday. I love Fridays... I don't know why. The feeling of the weekend approaching I think. Although, Jay has to work this weekend :( It's a love/hate feeling I have when he's working the weekends. Yay OVERTIME and boo weekend alone :(

Oh well... tomorrow prolly holds a lot of cleaning for me. I just can't seem to get a wrangle on two things - 1 Brooklynn's toys and 2 CLOTHES. I have 4 laundry baskets... ALL filled with clean clothes.... I just can't seem to keep up.

Another thing that really pisses me off is that EVERYTIME I get this house clean and organized CAMI (our big dog) gets out of her kennel and TEARS everything UP! It's this feeling of defeit... and then I don't get around to cleaning it for a couple days after that... I hate that dog. I'm giving her 3 strikes from now on. If she poops, pees, or gets into things... she's gone. I can't stand it. I love dogs, but WHY does Jay insist on getting this big, dumb, pain in the ass dogs? Then Brooklynn gets SOOO attached to them....and I feel bad for getting rid of them. But after these 3 strikes I've already got planned that for Easter (or her birthday in June) We're going to get her a pug.

I hate pugs...or I did. In retrospect Betty - our pug. Was probably one of the best dogs we'd had. She was old and a little smelly... kinda weird too, but she didn't poop in the house. Her mouth was too small to really do any damage and she was such a little down to earth cuddler. I miss her :(

words.

This week in words - I think I like doing this sort of thing mid week - it gives me an idea of how my week is going and how I'm going to change things around for it to end. Monday is always the worst day - with Sunday always being the best. I wish every week could start nicely - but what can ya do? This week. Thankful. Drama. Chaos. Organize. Chocolate. and Cold. My words.



1. Thankful, 2. on being thankful, 3. Thankful, 4. chocolate cupcake, 5. Moonstruck chocolates, 6. Done!!, 7. bookshelf spectrum, revisited, 8. Cold Blue, 9. cold water, 10. Cold Feet., 11. Chaos, 12. the chaos theory, 13. Drama Queen, 14. Hail the Drama Queen!, 15. Evening drama., 16. Leaving Drama behind

cold.

I almost literally sit here with ice on my hands. It has to be but 50 degrees downstairs! I hate cold weather, and this house is so old and there are cracks and drafts everywhere. Gosh... I so think I'm going to start moving my computer upstairs for the winter!! Oh well I'll deal I guess... at least our pipes haven't frozen quite yet...

The Carolinas are beckoning me... I think I'm going to move there eventually... maybe sometime next year so we can be there before Brooklynn starts school... who knows.

Gosh... just checked the weather and it's going to be below freezing until Saturday... jeez. Did I say I hated winter??

Anyway...

I scrapped the other day but I've been so cold I haven't wanted to get on the computer. So oh well... here is my most recent Page:

Stay

Credits HERE

Oh and Traci Sims is having a sale at Your Digital Dream - everything 40% off. Which includes this awesome kit of hers (I can't wait to play with it!)

Posh Princess

drama.

Today must be Drama Tuesday. Law and Order SVU is on tonight...so I guess its only fitting. Jay and I are friends with a couple who are abusive to one another. As much as they love each other they fight and accuse each other of everything. When they fight its very abusive language and at times it gets physical...but they continue to stay together. The last few days have been filled with so much drama. Its made Jay and I very thankful for one another. Jay and I are very worried about them and especially their kids...Thank goodness Jay and I are as close as we are.

The weekend went pretty good. Saturday we went to a party for a friend. It was pretty crazy! I love my friends. I met Melissa when I was two... its funny because I don't really remember meeting her. I just remember she's always been there. Manda n Krista are sisters and I met them when I was five. I'm 22 now and we're still tight! Here is a few pictures from Saturday night.

Playing with Auntie Manda.


Manda playing beer pong!


Auntie Mel and Caliber


Just us being so cool :)


Krista and Amanda dancing!


Me N Jay


My beautiful kids enjoying their time.


And towards the end of the night...we get silly.


So Sunday was pretty busy. We went over to friends to watch the football game and we also found out our pipes froze AGAIN. BLAH. I didn't have my camera with me so I was unable to get a picture for that day.

Monday rolls around and pipes are still frozen. Jay stayed home from work to get them thawed. Boo. I also got my hair done. Tiffany did my hair, cut it and put redlights and highlights in it. It looks so good. I'll post a picture soon. Yesterday either. Boo.

Well here are my pics from the 18th and 19th anyway.

PAD - January 18th. Cameron - Practicing on my focusing still :D


PAD - January 19th - At the party...Amanda (my bff) and Jay (my DH) Aren't they cute?

pure.

OMG - I heard this song while I was driving to Hobby Lobby - LOVE IT! SO reminds me of me... lol.

one month.

Ok I WAS going to take a picture of something silly - and I did actually... Until I realized. CALIBER IS A MONTH OLD TODAY!!! So I have to do it - my PAD for January 17th is...

photography.

I know I don't have any regular blog readers... but let me pretend that I do.

Sorry for not posting at all yesterday. I've been pretty good about blogging lately I'd HATE to let it slide again. Yesterday I spent most of the day picking up the house and soothing a fussy baby. With the 2 or 3 hours of personal computer time that I may have gotten yesterday I was researching 'focus' on ILP. I guess there were many posts I have missed lately on there. I learned a few things while taking the time out of the day for my photography. I looked back at some photos I bombed on and after reading up yesterday I could immediately pin point what I could've done differently as I looked at the settings for each photo. Now I'm ever so confident that my next shoot will go quite a bit more smoothly!

So my photo-a-day project. I've been taking photos everyday. Pretty aimlessly really. I just photograph what I do or one of my kids. Yesterday I did a bunch of practice shots of my vacuum cleaners and my daughter... I started this project late because of having a newborn, things took a while for me to get used to again. I decided I'll just go the year from the first photograph. I actually missed a few days though because I ended up getting sick with a fever and stomach flu. It wasn't pleasant and I just didn't even CARE about the project while laying up in bed burning hot with cold chills and trying to still take care of my newborn, lol.

PAD - January 11th. The love for money is the root of all evil.


PAD - January 14th. A growing boy.


PAD - January 15th. My pleasant daughter. (do you see her little smile in her sleep?)


PAD - January 16th. Just practicing - reminding myself to continue practicing...


Now I haven't taken any photos yet today, but I will :D I'm feeling silly. I may just take a picture of one of Brooklynn's toys, lol.

Ok so I suppose I'm done. I've got some scrapping to do :D Lots of photos to catch up on, as you can imagine!

my week in words.

I think I'm going to start describing my week in words. It's hard not to. I'm feeling very inspired by words lately. find. slumber. down time. caffeinated frustrated. I used these words and searched flickr for visual illustrations of them. And from that I created my first mosaic (thanks to Ali Edwards for the inspiration {of course}).



1. The Little Sad Flower, 2. Mr. Anger, 3. anger, 4. frustrated, 5. coffee, 6. discover the inside, 7. Upside Down Time, 8. Ohhh . . . yes!, 9. Saturday's Find, 10. Yard Sale Finds, 11. Find the man 3, 12. green ones are hard to find, 13. Frilly Finds..., 14. lost and sometimes found, 15. Slumber, 16. sibling slumber...